Yesterday was a BIG effing deal for me.
I rode a stationary bike!
I never thought I’d be in a situation where I’d be ELATED to ride a bike. For 6 whole minutes. But there I was, peddling- one foot in front of the other- and it was as if I’d won the lottery. I looked at my physical therapist and said, “I’m ridding a bike! Omg, I’m riding a bike!!!”
I almost wanted to cry.
In case you’re unaware, I had surgery on my left knee 3 weeks ago to remove part of my bone that had physically come off the joint. (I know, gross) My doctors have let me know 1) My running days are “a thing of the past” (this KILLED me to hear), and 2) somewhere in the near future, I’ll need surgery involving a donor graph and a long recovery with 3+ months of crutches.
And just like that, I knew. “Okay, Sandy. The gig is up.”
Have you ever been in a situation like that? Where you were FORCED to have a new perspective? Where your subconscious literally tapped you on the shoulder and said, “Seriously- we have to start taking care of ourselves.”
I know in the grand scheme of things, this isn’t a big deal. But in my little world, it’s everything. I have friends that have gone through MUCH worse (one was diagnosed with leukemia weeks ago; another had a heart transplant last year) and yet; my little knee surgery has helped me see things from their perspective.
I find myself filled with gratitude every time I’m in the doctor’s office. Every time I see a new patient next to me in physical therapy, working through whatever it is they’re working through. I want to talk to them. I want to ask them about their life. I want to tell them how proud I am of them for showing up.
Every time I get a call from one of the nurses, I think to myself, “This is part of your life now, Sandy.”
And, in a really twisted way- I needed it. I needed a wake up call.
With that said, I’m going to end this with gratitude. This has been on my mind and in my heart lately and I wanted to share.
Thank you for the opportunity to see things from a new perspective. Thank you for showing me of the greatness of the human spirit. Thank you for introducing me to amazing individuals who are going through illness, recovery, and life-changing scenarios and STILL show up for themselves. Thank you for helping me pause, and be more mindful. Thank you for giving me a new reason to care about myself. Thank you for allowing me to set new goals that are training my mind to think differently than it has in the past. Thank you for reminding me of what incredible friends and family I have, who are ready to love and support me whenever I need it. Thank you for helping me find “me” again. In one of the most unconventional, humbling ways possible.
Sending you love, light, and healing. We’re in this together.